Spring Wants

The shit I tell myself

This is my wannabe haiku

Over

Know your worth

I'm Doin Me #np

Deserve ...More

Growing pains - #6 #np

 shhh ends in silence ironic


s/n I love the song "In the morning" by Kelis- I close my eyes and pretend Pharell  is talking to me.

Guarantees

Red lights mean hot doughnuts

Cards say you are loved, you are invited

Hellos, and thank yous show appreciation

Phone calls mean thinking of you. . . . I need you advice I need your wisdom

Life has a few guarantees, I don't know what I can guarantee the people who have love/luv (there is a difference)
for me.

Its got me thinking sometimes I can guarantee a shoulder to vent on, a funny joke, a crazy memory, an honest opinion or a caring genuine spirit.

I try not to find validation for anything in anyone but subconsciously it happens.
I am me , I am  a giver, a pleaser, a mediator. But what happens when:
 I have none left to give
You take too much
My happiness doesn't penetrate your bubble
I decide not to take sides and my opinion matters less
I need you
What happens when I you can't guarantee me anything

Glad that God can guarantee me EVERYTHING

Whats in my cup?

Equal parts Sprite and Three Olives Purple!  My new fav!

Anybody else, wanna know what he was saying?

Lately

uggh ,LaTeLY I have been quite the "debbie downer"...
just plain lazy too!

On my days off I feel like my brain is at a complete stand still. I have no desire to be depressed, everytime I "snap" myself out of it. I go right back in?

Refocusing my energy elsewhere is not working...isolation is no longer my solace. But I kinda loathe being around even those I LOVE. I will get better..time will tell everything. Getting evaluated on my job, which in the past has been a wonderful experience. But I digress that I am not always the best ME I can be. Which stifles my productivity but I do what I can considering the things I have to work with.... off to find a moving company, go to the gym and work and find time to cook, and think about dating again.

teigh

Sometimes I isolate myself
I let people see bits and pieces of me
I'm still trying to make sense of it, so I cant take criticism unless in mini doses.


Loving the Love Letter album, and LTTP!
i'm convinced I am a hopeless romantic, or maybe I like the idea of romance?


I have a ton of things in my closet yet I still have nothing to wear, i've added color to my clothing/accessory palette in the form of a blue purse! 


Cutting my hair shorter tomorrow better my hair than my wrists! - Yep I said it but I scratched it  2011 is my SEASON

Polyvore madness....made me late for work

NYE 2010 by highteighblog featuring hoop earrings

What a Great Holiday

Jesus and my Granny share the same CakeDay!  This was a hectic Christmas at work, hauling toys without a sleigh, making sure all the kids got toys and clothing. It did my heart good though, if I didn't get any gifts for Christmas I was totally ok with that. I don't think i've honestly ever felt that way. I always anticipate that holidays and gift giving and receiving. This year I was just looking forward to being with my family and spending QT w/shhhh.  Especially since I spent Thanksgiving in TX, and missed out on all the food. But it was worth it seeing my Dad.  
S/n I have to go to work today after being snowed in for a few days , nothing about that place excites me. I thank god I have job,I'm gonna do my best daily. BUT I am filling out applications daily. Especially since my Hunny fixed my PC :)

Life . . . . it just happens

Is life really meant to be figured out? Mannn so many thoughts and ideas rape my brain ..especially when i'm working, sleeping...trying to sleep.Ive written a book in my head, I read it in my sleep... sooo hear goes nothing:

Did u see the soul train awards... I did, lost count of how many times. I love Ms. Baker  s/o to PANDORA.  .. exhibt A : Freddy Jackson that guy is NSFW....exhibt B the show made me want new music like a new Adele album. running to buy The Sea when I get a free paycheck. I think it'll make me happy, either that or I should be able to at least clean up or drink a bottle of wine to it.

The Shhh! guy is still in my  bubble, his smile makes me smile, his laugh makes me laugh, I'm putting good energy out for us ..hope I get it back 

....I miss my friends alot, or do i just miss the times we had, or where I was in life then?

Man i'm 28  single as in not married...No kids on the horizon...shhh! and I are committed

I often feel like I should be commited, apart of me has died chasing my little girl dream, not i'm just chasing pavements....things are hard ..set in stone ....my faith hasn't reached jackhammer status....s/n i dont obsesses about these things .....more patience is a goal

I spent every weekend in Nov. doing something.. it was hectic I like to keep busy , it relaxes my conscience and forces me to live in the moment. 

I think alot maybe thats why I tend to tune people out or cut them off in conversations..... Inside I predict the what ifs and assess risks..its a terrible habit! There is a child in me that is deathly afraid to take risks....I sweat and go into mental overload when I don't feel safe. 

Happiness is good in small doses...lately i've been using all my happiness for others! I know some people who are simply wonderful @ life.

pouring into my glass to make it full

All White Party

Must -Haves if  I was going to an all-white party.

With an unlimited budget :)

You can THANK ME NOW

DRAKE, what an unexpected surprise....my pandora stations are as follows: Anita Baker, Monica, Brandy, Eric Roberson, Janelle Monae, Solange....I thought Drake was just a know catchy young money dude. How wrong was I ? I saw bits of his "When I was 17" and gained a new respect for him. And his huslte, honestly I really like his CD.  It is absent of the overly sexist lyrics, apathetic emotions, and doesn't read like a excerpt from the wire. Hooray!! The beats are calm, too many I like all the songs. Im glad he's recognizing "fancy" ladies, instead of money grubbing hoes. Love the struggle about changing and being who he is now vs. who he was before the fame.


Heavy Rotation; Fireworks, Karaoke, Light it up

Tis the Season for weddings

This is the time of year for weddings. What to wear is always an issue. First off are there really rules? Some people say you can't wear white, or black. Well I  sayy it maybe a little impolite to wear white considering the bride. But if your going to you ex's wedding white it is!! j/k kinda....anyway here are a few looks that I would definately wear to a wedding. These are the types of place/themes I had in mind. Can you guess which dress?

Themes/Locations

• Preppy spring outdoor wedding
• After 5 
• Traditional
• Bohemian
• Miami

Highatus (hiatus)

If you ever enjoyed a post i'm sorry I been gone so long.... Alot of new happenings going on in my personal and professional life. I also wanted a new layout for my blog. To no avail. ..My head has been swarming with plenty of new blog posts so im going to update a few today and a few in a couple of weeks. My internet is out so my time is limited.

Sshh!

Shhh don't tell anyone

I can't remember the last time it felt like this

No actually I do...But never in my fully mature adult life

Really getting along, no qualms...everything is calm

Bored together but having the best time EVER!

Attentive, kind, gentle and genuine somethings I hardly even find in my coworkers

Cant wait to see where this road will leave
...

Shhh I have to keep it a secret....because I don't wanna jinx it :)

Offended much?

URBAN MURAL
Original Article on Fox News

go figure

Is this artwork? Or such a harsh reality that it makes buppies offended? Are you that removed from urban reality or the depiction of it that you never met "cha-cha" or "Ray-ray's girl". Well.. I for one am not. Yes, I was raised in the semi/cityish (yes i made that up!) suburbs. But while I would love to celebrate a mural of Serena, Condolezza, and Mrs. Obama. But I even work in a school, that is of mixed population. I do see "Serena" coming to pick up little Grace with a business suit. However more commonly I spot "Lashay" coming to pick up "Sincere and Nasir" with 4-inch heels , jeans soo tight I know she was at the club last nite! You know with the black weave and purple extensions in the front. While I would like to say Only God Can judge them, the fact is that society has seen the image place out so often. It becomes the norm. So yes I love to see people of all races in a positive light. But this images are ReAliTy for someone. SN: Is it me or does everything "urban" appear to be "ghetto". Just wondering.

For the Luv of Hov....

.

Snippet for an documentary soon to air on FaceBook. Say hov!

Unsurprisingly Good

This was my first ever Christian fiction book written by a Caucasian author. I know, I know who cares about color. But I just like to support African-American authors. fist pump! I got it from a co-worker who loves books. We usually share our love for good books and distaste for some urban fiction. So naturally I was game especially after she told me she almost chose reading over shopping. I haven't read a book that I couldn't put down in forever. The last one was What Becomes of the Brokenhearted by E. Lynn Harris. R.I.P. When she lent it to me and I saw the cover, I was honestly in no mood to get reading. However Chapter 1 changed that! This story is based on the biblical text of Hosea. In short a man is told by God to marry a prostitute. In turn her gives her the BEST life she could imagine and she turns him away So many times. Although it the book is set during the time of the Oregon Trail I enjoyed it. The book gives insight into how God's love is unfailing, thus a REAL man after his own heart has love too! Love that is unfailing. I could go on for days but just read the book. It won't disapoint IMO. Happy Sunday

Splitsville

Two of my favorite celebrity couples have jumped ship! D-nice & Malinda are just newlyweds. I was really rooting for this couple. Especially after the way Mehki Phifer dogged her out years ago. (Google it!) Her wedding was fab, so was her shower hosted by G.Garvin..Well I hope they can work it out. The other couple I was rooting for was Monica and Rocko. I will admit to d/l I'mma do me...lol I really wasn't rooting for them to get married. Untilllll I saw the nice family structure they had going on. Via the Still Standing Show. They appeared to have such a strong family bond. I knew there had to be a reason she didn't marry him. I'm sure he was probably living in the shadow of her career somewhat. But really Rocko she stayed off the music scene for a while. So you could "DO YOU" I am really upset at how this is going to effect the boys. :( This is a classic case for my arguments against "Shacking UP".

We gotta do better!